Should Federer Retire?

He may have been everyone’s favourite to win Wimbledon over the first week and after two sets yesterday it looked like it was plain sailing, so much so John McEnroe said Murray better be ready to be on court after only 1 hour 30 mins.  

Then something changed.  Tsonga to his credit started playing lights out tennis, and Federer just switched off and went in to this world where he just expected Tsonga to roll over and capitulate.  Unfortunately for Federer this did not happen, and then Tsonga played three of the best sets of tennis of his life, to oust the great Swiss.

Federer did not have any answers when everything clicked into place for Tsonga, he was blown off the court in many ways, he never broke his serve apart from the first game of the first set, and honestly never really looked like breaking it again.  Federer seemed to have nothing in the tank to step it up and take it to the next level, like he would have done in the past.  There was one break of serve where Tsonga’s blistering, shot making fury, destroyed Federer’s serve, like a tornado destroys a house.

Now you start to wonder whether if you were in Federer’s shoes; would you decide to retire, to end on a relative high, maybe after the US Open.  Or do you plug away in the vain hope that it will all come good again, like so many aging great champions of sport, sometimes try to achieve. 

Let’s be honest here, Federer is not exactly in a dire position, he still has the tools and the game to win Grand Slams, but does he now have that mental capability, the extra desire, the want or need, to go that extra step like he needed to do against Tsonga, yesterday.  Or when he was serving for the set against Nadal, in the French Open final; or when he had two match points against Djokovic in last year’s US open, it is unlikely to happen.  And if it did how many less than good results will fall before it happens. 

The problem is never an easy one when discussing the greatest of the greats, near the end of their supreme powers, because generally they are still way better than everyone else.  But Federer has now not won a GS in six attempts; he has only made one final, and has now lost in three quarterfinals.  And this time at Wimbledon, his favourite surface, the one everyone said was going to gain him his seventh title, and his seventeenth overall, he was found wanting again.  This time though he cannot use the excuse he has a bad back, or any other complaint, it is just that he has lost that little something that made him so special for so many years.

Does he want to continue playing tennis and be like everyone else, hoping to win another Grand Slam, accepting that a quarterfinal or semi, is as far as he will go in a championship.  Slowly but surely diminishing his status as the greatest player ever.  What does he do if he does not win another slam by the end of 2012, maybe, that is what he is holding on for, a last hurrah at the home of tennis, winning the one tournament he does not have, the Olympics?  

It is always a shame when you see someone like Federer starting to fade away, even if it is only slight, when you have achieved so much and been as great as Federer I suppose it is hard to realise when it is over.

Umm!!!

If you are alive,

Strive to survive,

If you can see,

You’re own mortality,

Stretched out,

In front of thee,

Laughing and giggling,

Out loud constantly,

No escape the curse,

Never-ending reality,

A version of cruelty,

Systematic of insecurity,

Deemed illogical,

Lacking maturity,

Flying one way,

Then the next,

Try to not be vexed,

Pushed into submission,

At the control of others,

And of course their volition.

Increased CO2 cuts from 20% to 30% - what a joke!!!

I am not sure which Muppet David Cameron would be, but he is definitely one of Jim Henson’s creations. As if trying to reduce CO2 emissions by 20% is not bad enough he wants to make it 30%, what planet is this fool living on? For starters it is total lunacy to even try to reduce CO2, as it will have no effect on the environment. What is strange is that whilst crucifying our country by continuing the devastating green targets, we are also backing the Canadians in using their dirty environmentally unfriendly tar sands oil. As well as the terrible costs, and the destruction of the Canadian forests, our Muppet government does not want to ban its use, yet it is quite prepared to send our country back to the dark ages with their archaic green policies.


Two faced, back stabbers comes to mind when discussing politics in the UK, whether they are on the imaginary left or imaginary right.

Here is a little poem about Politian’s.



I am a Politian, and I’m very good at lying,

I pretend I want to help you,

Yet ignore you when you’re crying,

All I care about is prestige,

How much money can I make,

I don’t care about the public,

All I do is smile and fake,

I don’t care about the poor,

I don’t care about the old,

All I care about is my castle,

To get the best price when it’s sold,

And when finally I get sick of lying,

I can write a big fat book,

And snigger in the background

When people pay to have a look,

I am a Politian, and I cannot help but laugh,

As long as everyone keeps electing us,

You will never get good staff.

The blinded fools, the do-gooders, are ironically likely to destroy the world than save it. In fifty years time when the few, and I mean the very few, own everything and they have a wonderful lifestyle whilst the rest of the world lives in absolute misery. These do-gooders can sit back and tell their children, yes little Johnny, we only have electricity for ten hours a day, and we cannot travel and the world is a shitty mess, but at least we managed to reduce carbon emissions by 20%. Yes, but daddy it didn’t make any difference, did it.

The Wonderful World of Terry Pratchett’s Discworld

I said I wouldn’t write about this until I finished all of the books but, I have decided to write a little bit anyway. It’s good to write especially when you feel in the mood to write. I feel like this is a bit of a betrayal though, since I find it increasingly difficult to read books, I have to listen to audio books, it is the only way I have to keep up with literature. Audio books have saved me from oblivion, and the latest set of audio books that I am listening to, are Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series.


When I was younger I had trouble reading fictional stories, yes I read Lord of the Rings, and CS Lewis, but fiction did not interest me in the same way historical, geographical or scientific books interested me. My brother was an avid reader; he loved every kind of book you were supposed to read as a child, I never did. To me it was far more interesting reading the massive; Times - History of the World, than reading the Famous Five. A 1000 Great Events was looked at far more than, the Hardy Boys or even the Hobbit, for that matter. So when my brother started reading Terry Pratchett and telling me they were brilliant I said, “Nah they are not for me.”

So to a few months ago, my depression was getting on my nerves, I find the best way to get though it, is to allow it to pass and just wait. Normally I do this with audio books, and I have listened to quite a few, from Harry Potter, to Lord of the Rings, Dan Brown, Isaac Asimov, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, Phillip Pullman’s The Northern Lights, and Artemis Fowl, Agatha Christie and Sherlock Holmes. You name it I have given it ago, and then my brother gave me his collection of Terry Pratchett audio books and mentioned Wee Free Men, said the Nac Mac Feegles were dead funny. They were so funny that they pulled me out of my depression straight away and I got an idea for a children’s book of my own.

From then on I have listened to Discworld novels when I have felt depressed or just in need or some time to relax. I am presently up to the Nightwatch, which follows my favourite story arc, the City Watch. In a way now I think about it, audio books are like a security blanket for me a present, they get me through bad spells in my mental health recovery. They allow me to find time to escape the world I see around me, and to enter someone else’s imagination for a while, and Discworld is great for that.

Discworld is pretty unique I suspect, and the genius behind its creation Terry Pratchett is definitely someone I would love to meet and talk to. He makes lovable characters, which make you want to know more about them. My favourites are Death, the whole City Watch, the Patrician, The Wizards especially Mustrum Ridcully, the Nac Mac Feegles of course, the Igor’s, and the main Witches, Granny Weatherwax, and Nanny Ogg. I think that covers nearly everyone, not so keen of Rincewind, and the more pathetic characters.

Favourite stories so far are; ‘Guards! Guards!’; ‘Mort’; ‘Men at Arms’; ‘Jingo’; ‘Carpe Jugulum’; ‘The Last Continent’ and ‘Nightwatch’.

It would be great if someone would do to Discworld similar to what ITV did to Sherlock Holmes, and Agatha Christie’s Poirot and Miss Marple. I am surprised; there have not been more of his books made into films or TV, especially this day and age. Even more surprising are the choices so far, the Hogfather, the Colour of Magic (possibly the worst book with Witches Abroad), and Going Postal. Better choices would be the City Watch arc in my opinion; you could easily make a great fantasy TV series out of Sam Vimes, and the City Watch.

It is a shame Sir Terry has Alzheimer’s disease, I watched his depressing programme about euthanasia and whether you should have to right to kill yourself, if you deem your life to not be satisfactory. It was sad to see that someone who has brought so much joy to the world thinking in such terms. Not that I blame him, as I have had similar thoughts, though for different reasons.

I now look forward to his next book as I should have finished all of the audio books by then. ‘Snuff’ I think it is called, I will buy it and try to read it, and hopefully I will be able to. Then I will have to go and buy all his other books to read.

Operation Barbarossa – 22nd June 1941

It’s hard to imagine what it must have felt like being on the Russian Front 70 years ago; it was the beginning of the worst catastrophe in the history of mankind. And when you think of all the horrendous acts we humans have carried out over the years; that is saying something.

On June 22 at around 4am, thousands of German attack bombers, thousands of German tanks and over four million men began Operation Barbarossa. I’ve written about the Russian Front before, because I don’t feel it is a part of the Second World War that gets enough media coverage. Out of the 35 to 40 million people who died in the European part of WWII, the majority probably around 85% died on the Eastern front. It was the Great Patriotic War as the Russians called it; the war of annihilation, as the German’s saw it. It was bloody awful, dreadful beyond compare; you could say nothing really comes close to matching the violence and brutality caused; because of two insane ideologies.

Since I have discussed this before I am not going to discuss it again, I just wanted to make a note of it, because I feel it was the most significant war in the history of mankind, far more so than the western side of WWII. As it says in the excellent documentary series being shown on Military history this week, Soviet Storm, which shows the war from a Russian perspective. When General Keitel was asked at Nuremberg, when he realised the war was lost, he replied after Moscow.  Which just shows the lunacy of humanity, and how easily we can delude ourselves. The battle of Moscow was concluded in December 1941, only six months after the emphatic beginning. Yet by December the German army had been literally wiped out, with only reserves left to try and continue Hitler’s madness.

The rules of engagement were thrown out of the window, and the violence and senseless destruction and brutality of people, lives, humanity and basic civilisation was forgotten about for four terrible years.

Everyone should know what happened on the Russian Front, everyone single human alive should know the horror and barbarism caused, in the hope it will never happen again.

The Human Condition, the Human Disaster

You know when you use your brain and think and try to establish a commonality with your fellow man. Why is it that we find the majority of people are good, decent, people, yet we are overcome and controlled by a few who do not share these ideals? All they want is to control you, to make your life miserable, so they do not feel miserable, so they can feel what others feel automatically.


Why is it if so many people are generally good and love life as well as their fellow man, that we allow these few miscreants to destroy lives and force the rest of us to live lesser lives. Why is this the case? Why can’t it change? How can it change?

Why is it we allow this to happen? Is it because these evil destroyers, these disillusioned few; have some kind of hidden power which the rest of us do not understand. And for some reason we are inveigled into trusting them, we allow them to control us and we do nothing to change it. It’s like we know they are bad and do not want to help us, they only want to help themselves.  Yet we are not like them and are not interested in the power and control, so we end up subservient to them and just accept the dreadful situation they have created. We just want to live our lives in peace and harmony, but since it does not satisfy the deceivers, we the majority have to suffer.

There are so many examples throughout history and even now the pattern never changes, you would have to write a book the size and length of War and Peace just to discuss them. Why do some people hate the fact others may enjoy something, like living a happy life, without fear, or stress, or pain?

To think I live in a country that was the once cornerstone of liberty and freedom, yet now it is falling down the pan quicker than a large turd is flushed down a toilet. We have the wonderful choice of one shit selfish political party, over another shit selfish party. They are laughable and everyone laughs at them, as the visit from the American President showed, yet we cannot do a damn thing to change it.

And what would we change it to? Another form of control; which the same types of power hungry controllers would want to take advantage of. We are stuck between a rock and a hard place; we left one tornado behind, only to find ourselves stuck in the middle of a hurricane, and if and when the hurricane ends, we will just find a tornado or some other dreadful human disaster to take its place.

We worry about natural disasters but believe me human disasters are far worse. At least there are times when there are no natural disasters, whereas we are constantly updating our human ones. They follow on like a precession, a production line of greed and ineptitude; never learning to help its public, only wanting to help itself. They think they know better than the rest of us, they think they need to control you, and give you basically nothing. A shit life, where you are basically a slave until you die, is what they think is acceptable.

Is it acceptable? Should it be acceptable? And why do we accept it? Because we are not like them, we do not want to cause a fuss; we do not want to rock the boat. We just want to be happy, and have some peace and harmony, this is what I would suspect nearly every human being in the world wants. Yet why is it that if the majority wants this, then why can’t we have it? Why do we allow the few to keep us trapped in misery, and slavery, poverty, fear and insecurity?

We will ever get this happy harmonious life, or will it always be the case that the dreadful power-hungry few will never allow it to happen. And even if some knight in shining armour comes along as has happened before, and probably happens more than you think; because they are not naturally evil like the hidden others, they are eventually and unwittingly, controlled themselves.

How can anyone realistically believe in a God, when people like this exist?

Sensational Jensen Button wins exciting Montreal GP

Safety cars, rain delays, waterlogged track did not stop the Montreal GP being one of the most exciting GP’s I have ever watched. It all looked like another win for Vettel, until an inspired Jensen roared from the back of the field to take an unlikely first place.

I’ll be honest as I sat there watching the rain pouring down, listening to David Coulthard and Martin Brundle tell us they were sorry for the rain delays, trying to fill in time. I was about to call time myself and decide not to watch. I am glad I didn’t because what a race, it had everything; crashes, overtaking, penalties, incidents, spins, blown tyres, mistakes, and of course some brilliant driving.

You cannot say Formula One is boring anymore, the only dull bit was the start, they did not need to start under a safety car, and even when they decided to go back out after the delay, they didn’t need to be behind a safety car for as long as they were. Yet this did not spoil an exciting race, Jensen Button was simply sensational, to fight from the back of the field, after god knows how many pit stops and a drive through penalty was fantastic to watch.

Mind he could have been out of the race near the start, as the accident prone Hamilton managed to hit Webber first, and then tried to squeeze down a part of disappearing track, trying to overtake Button, which knocked Hamilton out of the race.

Then the race was stopped after only twenty odd laps, and we waited for nearly three hours to start the race again. I am pleased they decided not to abandon the race, as once it started again and a tiny strip of dry race line started to form, it made the race really exciting. Overtaking was treacherous, but with the DRS it was possible. Then as he tried to overtake Alonso in a difficult chicane, Alonso closed the chance but was accidentally taken out of the race, and Button was dead last, as he changed from intermediates to slick tyres. The new tyres helped Button fly through the field and he was catching the leaders, though it did not seem likely he could win the race. Then Nick Heidfeld hit the back of Kobayashi’s car, and another safety car was released. This allowed the front runners to catch Vettel who had been in front the whole race.

Luck seemed to be on Vettel’s side once more as he was able to take full advantage of every safety car, but the last one proved to be a disadvantage as Schumacher, Webber and flying Button caught him up. It all lead to a thrilling last few laps, as Button tried to pass Webber, and Webber tried to pass Schumacher. With slick tyres on it was hard to get any grip off the racing line, and eventually Webber made a mistake trying to pass Schumacher, Button pounced and passed him. Button then went straight past Schumacher and was now only a few seconds behind Vettel with two laps to go.

The pits told him, “you can catch him”, and he did very quickly, as they entered the final lap, which started with only a few seconds to spare until the two hour mark was up, Vettel was less than a second ahead of Button. The pressure was building for Vettel and half way around the last lap, he made a mistake and Button flew passed him. The crowd roared and so did McLaren’s pits, as Button took the chequered flag, what a race.

It has to be one of the best races I have ever watched, for drama and excitement, Button and Webber will be very pleased considering their situations before the restart. Vettel, Alonso and Massa will all be disappointed. As for Hamilton well he needs to get his head examined, to be involved in so many incidents on a wet day in the first ten laps, is not going to help him ever win a championship again. He is far too reckless, and makes bad judgements and decisions under pressure, he needs to calm down and remember the length of the race.

Overall I was pleased Button won, he goes second in the championship and maybe it will light a spark under him and his team, to at least try and compete against Vettel. McLaren still made mistakes; imagine how well Button would have done if he had not had to pit 6 or 7 times and if he had not driven too fast when the first safety car was out, stupid mistakes that need to be ironed out.

If this is the future of Formula One then it is a bright future, it might be more like a Playstation game these days for the drivers with so many paddles and buttons, but for the public it is thrilling and exciting to watch.

Man from Tobermory

Did you ever hear the story about the man from Tobermory,

He was sitting in his car and when he blew up,

The man his name was Bob, and he was a big fat slob,

If he’d eaten less for dinner then he'd have been a little thinner,

But his weight it was so heavy, and it made the car unsteady,

Then it caused a big vibration, and then a strange sensation,

Before long Bob just blew up and he popped.

I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish

Christ I am in a sad pathetic mood today, I feel like the shitty part of a romantic comedy when you yawn and go oh dear god they've just spoilt this film.  So I decided to write a sad little tune to go with it.

Wishes...

Dreams...

Emotions...

Beliefs...



I wish I could feel happy,

I wish I could feel fulfilled,

I wish I could be satisfied,

I wish I could be chilled,

I wish I could feel a woman’s touch,

I wish I could see her tender smile,

I wish I was a better man,

I wish I had a sense of style,

I wish I flowed with confidence,

I wish I could do something wonderful,

I wish I could feel like I belong,

I wish I felt like I was strong,

I wish I could find a way out,

I wish I did not feel trapped and alone,

I wish someone thought I was special,

I wish that they felt special too,

I wish I wasn’t hopelessly lost,

I wish I could meet one of the few,

I wish I didn’t feel negative,

I wish didn’t go up and down,

I wish I could just raise a smile,

I wish I didn’t want to frown,

I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish,

But whats the point in that,

Wishes never seem to come true,

And that’s just a terrible fact.

The Curse

I live in a time,

A time full of hate,

Nothing but selfishness,

Stands at the gates.



As greed and corruption,

Rise above all,

Who can stand up to them,

And fight for the cause.



It’s hard not to see,

All the pain and misery,

It’s hard not to hear,

Them crying in fear,

It’s hard not to notice,

Where it’s going wrong,

It’s easy to turn,

A blind eye to it all.



I live in a time,

A time with no peace,

Faceless bureaucracy,

No one can defeat.



Can we ever learn,

Not to repeat,

Mistakes of the past,

To live in harmony.



It’s hard not to see,

All the pain and misery,

It’s hard not to hear,

Them crying in fear,

It’s hard not to notice,

Where it’s going wrong,

It’s easy to turn,

A blind eye to it all.

The Wonder of Wimbledon

Wimbledon has a strange affect on Britain when it is on, I am not sure if it is the same now as it was when I was younger, mainly because there is more tennis shown on TV these days. But I always remember as a child loving Wimbledon, even though I had at the time, no interest in tennis any other time of year. Suddenly for three or four weeks every park was full of kids wanting to play tennis, every year this happened, but then being Britain it died away as quickly as it arrived.


My first memory of the great Grand Slam would go back to Borg and Connors, not sure exactly when it was, but they are the first two players I remember. Then of course McEnroe, I remember the great final between Borg and McEnroe, but weirdly the match I remember more so, was the semi final between Borg and Connors the year later, when Borg came back from two sets down to beat the American. It stuck in my mind because it made me worry at the time that Borg would lose to Mac in the final, which he did. I was not keen in McEnroe, his shouting and tantrums just spoilt the tennis, in my mind.

There was also a match Connors played in 87, that I always remember, he was two sets down, being hammered, just looking up in Wikipedia it says he lost the first two sets to a guy called Mikael Pernfors, 6-1, 6-1, and was down 4-1 in the third. Somehow he managed to crawl back and win the third set, and then he was down in the fourth, but pulled that back and eventually won the match. I always enjoyed watching Connors play, he was such a fighter never gave up.

Apart from now, the early 80’s was the best time to watch tennis, loads of great players, and Wimbledon always had their upset package, like Chris Lewis in 83, and the crowd pleasers, Henri Leconte, springs to mind. He was always great to watch.

I remember the emergence of Becker, when he won as a 17 year old, and then of course Edberg. I remember the great final between Ivanisevic and Agassi, and then Wimbledon started to get boring, as Sampras won every year with big serve tennis.

We had Tim Henman, doing his best, getting close, but always running into a Sampras, and the one year he didn’t run into him he met an inspired Ivanisevic. Sometimes you could think that Britain was cursed to have the greatest tennis championships, but never have a Briton good enough to win it. Let’s hope that changes with Andy Murray.

Emotional Technology

Just thought of this song, it reminds me of the type of thing an aging Johnny Cash would sing. At least that’s how it sounded in my head.

When I look back upon my life,

It’s amazing how it looks,

Full of sadness, full of joy,

Disillusionment at the crux.



I wish I could say I’d been happy,

I wished I been fulfilled,

Full of goodness optimism,

The emotions that I’d spilled.



Unfortunately I cannot say,

That these nice things had happened,

As I cry into my beer at night,

Feeling sorry for these patterns.



Life spins around its merry dance,

Like emotional technology,

Never going where you want to,

Always moving the wrong way.



Life spins and spins its merry tune,

Like emotional technology,

Never going where you want it to,

Always moving far away.



My, oh my, oh my,

Sometimes I live,

Sometimes I die.



My, oh my, oh my,

Sometimes I cry,

Sometimes I sigh.



Maybe one day it will become clear,

Maybe one day the fog will lift,

And someone will love me always,

To pull me further from the cliff.



If ever that day happens,

I may be a merry man,

Full of laughter, full of freedom,

And not part of the damned.



Life spins around its merry dance,

Like emotional technology,

Never going where you want to,

Always moving the wrong way.



Life spins and spins its merry tune,

Like emotional technology,

Never going where you want it to,

Always moving far away.



My, oh my, oh my,

Sometimes I cry,

Sometimes I sigh.



My, oh my, oh my,

Sometimes I live,

Sometimes I die.



My, oh my, oh my,

Sometimes I cry,

Sometimes I sigh.



My, oh my, oh my,

Sometimes I live,

Sometimes I die.

X-Men First Class, is actually a first class film

For some reason I knew this superhero movie was going to have more about it than your usual superhero summer blockbuster. So I went to see it yesterday, and boy I was not wrong, this was a excellent film especially the first half. James McAvoy as Charles Xavier and the star of the show, the brilliant Michael Fassbender as Erik or Magneto, show the formations of the opposite views on how to deal with the sub species, humanity.


The film oozes class from beginning to end, with great performances from the entire supporting cast; it raises many questions about emotional bonds, about freedom, and being able to be oneself, without feeling abnormal.

I’ll not go into the story too much but it is roughly based around the Cuban missile crisis of the early sixties, and the attempts by the newly formed Mutant division of the CIA, to stop Sebastian Shaw from starting World War 3, so he can wipe out the inferior humans and leave only the superior mutants. Spice is added by the fact; Erik wants to avenge what happened in the concentration camps, when he first met Shaw.

The scenes between McAvoy and Fassbender, establish their kinship and special friendship, especially the scene when Magneto tried to move the radio telescope for the first time. “You have to be between anger and serenity”, Xavier tells Erik. The chemistry between the two main stars is exceptional and only goes to enhance the film.

You feel Erik’s pain and loss all the way through the story, especially in the first half, when he is searching for Shaw. The scene in Argentina was pretty intense and great to watch.

You can empathise with the mutants and why they think the way they do, they reference what modern humans did to the Neanderthals, and that as the new superior evolutionary step forward, they should do the same thing.

The ending is very poignant, as they finally defeat Shaw, only to see the great super powers turn on them. And then they have to chose, do they stay with Xavier and his ideology or do they go with Magneto and try to destroy humanity forever.

Can’t wait for the follow up if it’s as good as this one, it will be fantastic.

My Mind

Sometime I get little lines of verse in my head and from this a sort of poem come from it. I try to use then as a way of figuring out the situation I find myself in and how I may get out of said situation by using my only gift, imagination and creativity. I don’t have much confidence in my abilities at anything else but I know I can create and imagine, and so use it to comprehend. At least I like to think I can.

My Mind


I languish in the doldrums of eternity,

Unable to figure out consistency,

My mind it switches one way,

Then it switches to the other,

Unable to control it, or even to consider.



The situation goes from good to very bad,

I wish it didn’t make me feel so sad,

Sometimes it flashes brightly,

But can quickly change to dark,

Emotion is ferocious; it always leaves its mark.



My mind is swirling inexplicably,

Never knowing what it should or shouldn’t be,

It wants to drive me forward,

But it stuck in second gear,

Locked in one direction, heading for a wall of fear.



When will I figure out the simple things,

Enjoy the happiness it always brings,

Just accept surging emotion,

To unveil from darken shroud,

Accept the unacceptable, to feel satisfied and proud.



Does it matter, should it matter, will it matter,

Especially when you reach the final chapter,

Will my life be full of emptiness,

Cos I can’t break through the wall,

Fading away, never knowing, wondering about it all.



I do not want to see this happen to me,

I want to vaporise the cloud hanging over me,

Sometimes it seems so easy,

Then others it’s so hard,

Whenever I reach I level, I slip back to the start.



At least I still have some positivity,

Like a shield it keeps back my negativity,

Optimism is so crucial,

But it only lasts so long,

I want to feel some peace, I want to just belong.

All the Lies!!!

Well I have had this tune in my head for years and years, and for some reason I have decided to add lyrics to it. Doubt it has any relevance to anyone, but here it is, it’s like the chorus bit, I have other bits that go with it, but hey I have never put words to my tunes in the head before.  Well not the ones from old.  Oh if you sing it you have to put on a sort of Dave Mustaine out of Megadeth, from Peace Sells album sort of voicebox sound, for it to be like I imainged it. It has to sound sinister, shows how long it has been in my head.


The rhythm is closer,

My body is looser,

Sensation is burning my eyes,

I wanted to end it,

And never to send it,

Containing ferocious desires,

You can't see my actions,

Misleading reactions,

Appalling to hear all the lies,

From then a collection,

To the right direction,

The sooner it fades and it dies.

All the lies.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, all the lies.

The War on Drugs has failed

I read an interesting article this morning stating the war on drugs has failed. They state that the amount of money, resources and damage caused by trying to stop illegal drug cultivation, manufacture and consumption, is far greater than the damage caused by the drugs themselves.

If you look at this whole drugs business from another angle, it is more to do with control of societies and individual power struggles than it is to do with the different illegal drugs. In fact you could argue the whole title war on drugs is a misnomer, as it does not account for the myriad of drugs that the governments of the world allow its citizens to consume on a regular basis. The war on drugs should really be called the war on specific substances deemed not profit worthy at the turn of the 19th century. If we were really to have a war on drugs then, we would have a war on alcohol, nicotine, caffeine, codeine, high adrenalin sports, dangerous driving, road rage, workaholics, etc, etc; ok I am being a tiny bit facetious, but they are all dangerous drugs. If you use the term drug as meaning, being something a human enjoys but ultimately is harmful if excessively abused, on a regular basis.

I would imagine jumping out of a plane with a parachute on, is as dangerous as taking an ecstasy pill.  Yet one is regulated and made safe, the other is not.

When will we realise that the more you try to stop something, the more people will want to do it. If you look at cigarettes, which in my opinion is one of the worst drugs available and legal in this day and age. What is causing less people to smoke? It is the fact they cannot smoke in public places, it doesn’t ban cigarettes it regulates their usage. And because of this, I bet there has been a massive drop in cigarette use in countries following this policy.

You will never ever get rid of drug use, whether it is the legal kind or illegal, whether it is the substance version or the activity version. I did Go Ape recently and to me that was like taking a drug, it made me feel high as a kite, literally as well as actually. Yet if we take Go Ape as an example, it is just climbing trees, only they make it safer than the way you climbed trees when you were a kid.

I know that is a simple example, but it is true, people like drugs whether they will admit it or not, in fact we all love our drugs, everyone of us takes many different types every day.

Coffee in the morning, how many times do you hear someone say, “Oh I don’t feel awake until I’ve had my morning coffee.”

Then there is the headaches women, they have to have their fill of codeine, and the first cigarette of the day man, or a better one, which I never understood is when someone says, “doesn’t a cigarette taste better after a meal.”

Then there is the common one for stressed out workers, “I need a stiff drink after a hard day’s work.”

Or what about two of the most dangerous drugs that people use and abuse everyday, sugar and salt.  It is hard to imagine the untold damage they both cause especially in western societies.

Even going to the gym for some is a drug, I need to do some exercise, or I will get fat. Or if you are fat, I need another cream cake or MacDonald’s, to make me feel happy. The list is endless, we are all lovers of drugs, and they are all dangerous if taken to extremes, and abused. I remember working in a wine shop, and every day you would get the different types of alcoholics coming in, they all smelled really badly, they had bad skin and looked dreadful, you had the special brew grannies, and the Brandy guzzlers, some were more subtle, they changed their drinks every day. It was sad to see them, but imagine if they were cocaine addicts, they might end up with a criminal record and in some countries thrown in prison, it that right? Should it be a criminal offense?

Some people are always going to be extreme drug abusers, but most people are not, most people don’t drink excessive amounts of alcohol or too much coffee, they don’t smoke too many cigarettes, or even eat too much; most people are sensible and are able to realise when they have had enough. In a way the war on drugs is a war on intelligence, it says we are not intelligent enough as a species to know that snorting massive amounts of cocaine isn’t bad for you; or smoking too much cannabis is going to affect your psyche if taken regularly. Some people don’t know this, but most do.

Humans have an amazing ability to hide behind inaccuracies, they see things that are not there, I remember when Ecstasy was first used, and they said the most dangerous drug, it kills people, but it kills one or two people, not hundreds of thousands like alcohol or cigarettes do. We like to exaggerate, and jump on the band wagon; swine flu was an excellent example of exaggeration, which is a different story altogether, though it follows similar lines.

What really needs to be done is to find away to change people’s perspectives on what is a drug and what isn’t. What really does cause you harm, and what likely will not.

Management and control of drugs and their usage will always do a better job than criminalisation and punishment. Plus as soon as you legalise them you remove a massive criminal threat from the world. You remove massive sums of money going into the hands of terrorists and criminals. Surely that would be a good thing to see happen.

Six of England’s twelve man squad not born in England, so what!

Jade Dernbach has replaced Jimmy Anderson in the England squad and some will be questioning this, but I don’t see why. In this day and age with plenty of travel and the fact England, well Britain, is one of those old colonial, empire building, countries of the past, and basically has one of the most multicultural societies in the world. This is bound to have an effect on things like sports, especially a one like cricket, where this sort of thing has gone on for years and years. I remember a kid at school his father was Italian and his mother British, he had spent his whole life in Britain, but if you asked him which footie team he would play for (if he had been good at football) it would have been Italy, not England. I remember another kid who had a Scottish parent he had lived his whole life in England, yet he supported Scotland.

If you have some kind of association with the country you play for, then great; I draw the line if you don’t. Plus saying that Strauss and Prior aren’t really English is foolish, they have spent most of their lives here, OK Trott and Pietersen are slightly different, but they chose to play for England, not South Africa, and as far as Morgan in concerned England and Ireland have been swapping players in various sports for years. This is just the way it is in Britain, because of the multicultural and diverse society we live in.

Maybe if other less multicultural countries of the world, had better diversity and more tolerance to difference, then we wouldn’t have so many wars, racism, and violence, but hey that’s a different story altogether.

Can Murray emulate Lendl and finally work out how to win a grand slam?

You know I find it interesting when you read that there are so many comparisons between Djokovic's incredible unbeaten run and John McEnroe’s. Yet there is another little issue that was addressed on that Sunday in 1984, Ivan Lendl won his first grand slam beating McEnroe in the final, coming back from two sets down.

Lendl at the time was the bridesmaid of men’s tennis, making many grand slam finals and losing; he was entering his fifth final without winning one at the time. He was also older than Murray, yet after winning the French he went on to win seven more Grand Slams; one more than John McEnroe.

As a Brit, I hope Andy Murray can somehow emulate the great Czech player. He has the skills and the weapons to win, he definitely has the determination, he just needs a little bit of luck and a massive wave of positivity and we may see him challenging Djokovic.

If I was Andy Murray I would seek out Ivan Lendl and just talk to the tennis great, about how he handled losing so many finals, and what happened in his psyche to allow him to overcome the obvious demons that had held him back before the first win.

Ah it’s wonderful glorious June

The best month of the year has begun this week, and eventually we have some nice weather to go with it, June always brings up nice memories, mainly because it was always the start of the last term at school and generally the weather was nice, not always hot come on it is Britain, but is was generally decent for British standards. June has the longest day, Glastonbury and of course Wimbledon; this weekend sees the Derby and the Oaks, two of the five classic horse races. I’m not really a horse fan but when I was younger I remember one race involving Dancing Brave and Sharastani, which I suppose shows my age. I think Shahristani won the Derby instead of Dancing Brave (I had a bet on Shahristani that’s why I remember, even though I was probably a tinge underage). I also remember Dancing Brave getting his own back in the Prix de l'Arc de Triomphe when he stormed passed all the other horses like a turbo charged supercar, isn’t it weird what you can remember.

Glastonbury is always a place I wanted to go to, but never did, I wasn’t the type of person, nor were my friends to go down there and try and sneak through the fences, though I always wished I was. This year sees U2 and Coldplay adjourning the coolest festival around. Watching Glastonbury on TV is not the same, but it is one of those events like Wimbledon that the BBC do an excellent job with. You see in Britain we have the BBC, British Broadcasting Corporation, a national TV station that we pay a small license fee to get, and then we don’t have any ads whatsoever. This generally means for most of the year, we have to put up with a lot of propaganda and dross, but there are a few times like Glasto and Wimby when it just works perfectly. We get BBCi so you don’t even have to watch it all live, you can see the great line-ups weeks later on there, or if you miss a great tennis match it is on BBCi as well. The BBC is great for special events.

Glasto is always a time when you hear great new bands or even great old bands, that just may not have come into my tiny realm of perspective. I never thought I would like Iggy Pop until I watched him at Glastonbury, or many other bands. Some of my favourite bands I came across by accident, like the Hope of the States, I loved their albums, it’s a petty they split up, or Mumford and Sons, I could go on and on. Watching Muse live all those years ago turned them from a band with a few good songs to one of my favourite bands ever.

June also sees the release of the big summer blockbusters, I know most are generally rubbish, but there is always an air of excitement around them. How much will they make? Will they break box office records? If you are a sad movie geek like me these things matter, well at least they did.

June is when Britain is at its best, its best weather, its best everything; it’s just a pity it’s not like that the rest of the year.