Sometime I get little lines of verse in my head and from this a sort of poem come from it. I try to use then as a way of figuring out the situation I find myself in and how I may get out of said situation by using my only gift, imagination and creativity. I don’t have much confidence in my abilities at anything else but I know I can create and imagine, and so use it to comprehend. At least I like to think I can.
I languish in the doldrums of eternity,
Unable to figure out consistency,
My mind it switches one way,
Then it switches to the other,
Unable to control it, or even to consider.
The situation goes from good to very bad,
I wish it didn’t make me feel so sad,
Sometimes it flashes brightly,
But can quickly change to dark,
Emotion is ferocious; it always leaves its mark.
My mind is swirling inexplicably,
Never knowing what it should or shouldn’t be,
It wants to drive me forward,
But it stuck in second gear,
Locked in one direction, heading for a wall of fear.
When will I figure out the simple things,
Enjoy the happiness it always brings,
Just accept surging emotion,
To unveil from darken shroud,
Accept the unacceptable, to feel satisfied and proud.
Does it matter, should it matter, will it matter,
Especially when you reach the final chapter,
Will my life be full of emptiness,
Cos I can’t break through the wall,
Fading away, never knowing, wondering about it all.
I do not want to see this happen to me,
I want to vaporise the cloud hanging over me,
Sometimes it seems so easy,
Then others it’s so hard,
Whenever I reach I level, I slip back to the start.
At least I still have some positivity,
Like a shield it keeps back my negativity,
Optimism is so crucial,
But it only lasts so long,
I want to feel some peace, I want to just belong.