I wish I could control my brain at times, I wish I could learn to say the right thing, to not react the way I do to situations. I wish I could see the bigger picture, and understand that what I believe maybe total nonsense. Unfortunately my mind always thinks it’s right and never seems to realise when it is wrong until it is too late. This works well for imagining weird concepts and ideas, but is crap when working out human emotion. I know I make many mistakes, but I keep making the same mistakes, I never learn from those mistakes, why is that? Then to make matters worse, I punish myself for making the same mistakes over and over again, until I am battered and bruised, lost and dishevelled. I hope that one day I will wake up and realise my mistakes but I am frightened I never will and I will continue to follow the same path.
Dark inside the deepest thought,
A whirling microcosm of hellish creation,
Digging deeper ever closer,
Eventually it causes distress,
How do you stop the knoring aggravation?
How do you deal with all the stress?
When can you finally end the cruelty?
When can you finally pass the test?